PICTURE BOOK FOCUS How to Set-up the Action to Create a Satisfying Ending





Experienced editor Natascha Biebow shares tips on how to set up the action
to create a satisfying pay-off in your picture book.



 You’ve been waiting all morning, your stomach is rumbling. 

There it is, all set up to deliver: the bread, the mayonnaise spread, 
a taste of mustard, the ham and cheese filling,
the crispy lettuce . . . You can picture it in the details – the perfect sandwich.



But will it deliver?


Tantalizing Sandwich . . .  Is it as delicious as it SEEMS?!

That depends.

If all the elements aren’t set up just right (and maybe even one is missing)

so that they will hang together as one delicious WHOLE by lunchtime,

if they don’t speak to you on a personal level,

then it’s likely that first bite will be disappointing.

We’re all different. We all like different kinds of sandwiches – and books – sure, but intrinsically we all need to eat. And ideally, we’d prefer to eat something that is nourishing, that gives us pleasure, and that speaks to us. The kind of sandwich we’re after is often better than the one we can picture, and one we’d happily eat again, because...

...it’s SO satisfying! 

Cooking up your picture book is similar in many ways. You can try to sense-check your ‘satisfying-o-meter’ by looking first at the end result – the pay-off, the last lines, the ending.



Have all the elements been set up to give the most satisfying result? Have you fed the reader the right hints to bring them to your climactic turning point and resolution?  Does your character's motivation stack up with what happens in the ending?

If the author hasn’t chosen the right fillings and details to include, chances are the end will FALL FLAT. The resolution won’t have as much weight. 

Because picture books are so seamless once they’ve been created, edited and designed, it’s hard to picture this. But it’s a very common mistake! 

For instance: a story revolves around a baby monkey escaping from the zoo. The heroine, a little girl, goes to find it. After three false attempts, asking the neighbours if they've seen the runaway, she manages to track down the cheeky baby animal. It is returned to its mummy. All is well.

It is a plot with a beginning, middle and end, but it is also a bit of a ‘so what?’ plot. The resolution – that all is well – is oddly unsatisfying, given that a baby has been reunited with its mum. Readers should be all over it with the ‘aw’ factor, but...

Now, what if the author had set up that the baby monkey had been adopted by a mummy elephant? Instantly, readers will sit up and take notice of this unlikely pairing. And what if the author set up that the baby monkey is quite a cheeky escape artist and the girl is the one whom the Chief Zookeeper has placed in charge of looking after it and making sure it’s kept safe? Immediately, readers are more emotionally invested in her story, too, because the monkey has escaped on her watch. And what if the mummy elephant had previously lost her baby . . .?

Now that when she is reunited with the precious new baby monkey, see how this has more emotional weight? The premise and the action needed to be set up so that the stakes are higher and the characters’ motivation is clearer. 

Starting from the end then, here are some other examples: 

Is the premise clear, strong and unique? Does the language – and pattern of the refrain, if you have one – really deliver? Has it been set up so that the ending has weight?



Beautiful Oops! by Barney Saltzberg


Here is the final spread of Beautiful Oops! by Barney Saltzberg.

From Beautiful Oops! by Barney Saltzberg


It wouldn’t work if the author hadn’t set up previously some vivid examples of what is an OOPS! (see how the tear is transformed into a crocodile's mouth):

From Beautiful Oops! by Barney Saltzberg
From Beautiful Oops! by Barney Saltzberg

For the ending to have weight, it is essential that the author also sets up a key premise 

- that you can turn all kinds of different oops into something beautiful - as evidenced by the clever paper engineering transformation in this book, from this . . .(fold out the right-hand page)

From Beautiful Oops! by Barney Saltzberg
to this . . .
From Beautiful Oops! by Barney Saltzberg


SO now the reader can logically conclude that . . .

An oops is essentially an OPPORTUNITY to make something . . . Beautiful! 

Sometimes, what’s needed is an adjustment of the stakes – are they the highest they can possibly be so that readers will really care?

Click, Clack, Moo Cows That Type
by Doreen Cronin and Betsy Lewin
In Click,Clack, Moo Cows That Type by Doreen Cronin and Betsy Lewin, the author sets up that:

- the cows can type (I know!)
- the cows want electric blankets to keep them warm
- the farmer is perplexed and demands what a farmer should have (milk, eggs, etc)

From Click, Clack, Moo Cows That Type by Doreen Cronin and Betsy Lewin

The plot could have centred on the negotiation between the farmer and the cows to lead to a relatively satisfying outcome in which the cows would get their blankets. But this wouldn’t have been nearly as satisfying as the actual ending:


From Click, Clack, Moo Cows That Type by Doreen Cronin and Betsy Lewin

The key to this pay-off having weight is totally setting up that Duck is the neutral party and that the farmer is counting on Duck to resolve the dispute:
 
From Click, Clack, Moo Cows That Type by Doreen Cronin and Betsy Lewin

Without this, the ironic ending in which the ducks appropriate the typewriter for their own ends (a diving board), wouldn’t work. Also, notice that the rhythmical refrain has been turned on its head – now it’s not used only by the cows, but by the ducks also. As is the ‘bargaining letter’ to the farmer. 

It is the clever and tightly woven set-up of all these pattern elements that make this picture book so satisfying.

Consider also how the outcome for the main character at the end of the book has more impact if the author sets up specific details about the action and the character’s motivation that lead to this satisfying conclusion. It is these instances and their consequences that give the ending weight. Without them, the story’s conclusion would feel FLAT.

 
Shark Lady: The True Story of How Eugenie Clark Became the Ocean’s
Most Fearless Scientist
by Jess Keating and Marta Alvarez Miguens

In Shark Lady: The True Story of How Eugenie Clark Became the Ocean’s Most Fearless Scientist by Jess Keating and Marta Alvarez Miguens, it’s critical to the premise that the main character Eugenie is proven to be a ‘fearless scientist’ by the end of the book. 

Here is the final spread in the story:

From Shark Lady: The True Story of How Eugenie Clark Became the Ocean’s Most Fearless Scientist
by Jess Keating and Marta Alvarez Miguens


In this final spread of the book, the text tells readers that Eugenie has achieved her dream to prove that sharks "deserved to be studied ... protected ... loved."

THIS is Eugenie's dream. 

But, in order for this to have weight, the author had to have shown WHY (because a clear character motivation is key to any great picture book story). 

How?

First, the author showed how Eugenie discovered essential elements about sharks, using specific scenes and examples, setting up the pay-off in the plot: 

“Sharks were not mindless killers.

 
From Shark Lady: The True Story of How Eugenie Clark Became the Ocean’s
Most Fearless Scientist
by Jess Keating and Marta Alvarez Miguens

Sharks were beautiful.

Sharks were smart...”

 
From Shark Lady: The True Story of How Eugenie Clark Became the Ocean’s Most Fearless Scientist
by Jess Keating and Marta Alvarez Miguens
If the plot hadn’t set up these instances, these examples, the narrative would succeed in telling readers that Eugenie’s dream came true in the end, without showing it. It would feel FLAT.   

Importantly, though, for readers to intuit that Eugenie’s dream came true and for this fact to really have weight and resonate on an emotional level with them by the end of the book, the plot needed to do something additional:  

Show WHY it matters, building up to this moment:

From Shark Lady: The True Story of How Eugenie Clark Became the Ocean’s Most Fearless Scientist
by Jess Keating and Marta Alvarez Miguens

" ...Humans were hunting sharks all over the world..." 

So, now even higher stakes are set up - not only does Eugenie have to break the mould in terms of what girls can achieve in science and show that sharks are misunderstood, but the author has also set up that they are being hunted. Eugenie had to prove people wrong! By showing that sharks are smart and not 'mindless killers', Eugenie proved their worth – she became a truly fearless scientist, making her dream come true.

It is because of this, that the ending has weight, that it is satisfying, and readers feel happy for Eugenie (and the sharks).


Natascha Biebow is an experienced editor, mentor and coach, who loves working with authors and illustrators at all levels to help them to shape their stories. www.blueelephantstoryshaping.com

She is the author of the award-winning The Crayon Man: The True Story of the Invention of Crayola Crayons



Picture credits: Animals Baking and Badger Baking by kind permission of Lizzie Finlay
Sandwich: 
Marco Verch under Creative Commons 2.0

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