PICTURE BOOK FOCUS: Super Structure (Part 3) - CUMMULATIVE STORIES

 

 

Experienced editor Natascha Biebow shares tips on finding the right structure
to make your picture book shine.

Creating a great picture book is as much about what to leave out as what to put in.

 

Picture books are concise and this is why they are hard to write! When they’re finished, they look seamless, but behind the scenes, there is often a lot of unravelling and re-knitting to make each book really shine. 

There is so much that you want to include in your picture book, but knowing your structure will help you to tell the story you want to tell. In the first and second parts of this blog post series, we explored:

 

1. CLASSIC PICTURE and CONCEPTS BOOK STRUCTURE: our main character has a problem. The plot builds towards a climactic turning point (at which point something must change) and finally, delivers a satisfying ending. Concept plot structures are based on concepts such as seasons, counting, shapes, and the alphabet.

2. ROUTINES: Structures based on routines such as mealtimes, bedtimes, school day, and other everyday activities like visiting the library.

 

Now, let's look at another story structure that you can explore: 

2. CUMMULATIVE STORIES: In a cumulative story, the narrative builds on itself, adding on and repeating what’s come before.

This makes the story predictable, which is invaluable for emerging readers who are growing in confidence.
 

As the plot builds, they can predict what might come next. Children who aren’t quite reading yet, will derive enormous satisfaction from second-guessing the outcome and getting it right! But these books also have a twist or a surprise at the end – to make the build-up worthwhile and deliver a satisfying conclusion to the narrative. This is what will keep readers coming back to the story over and over again. 

Here are three classic cumulative stories that have inspired many contemporary spin-offs:

There Was an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly (published by Child's Play)

1. There Was an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly is a beloved children's folk song written in the 1940's. The melody was written by Alan Mills and the lyrics were written by Rose Bonne.

"There was an old lady who swallowed a fly,
I don't know why she swallowed a fly – perhaps she'll die!

There was an old lady who swallowed a spider
That wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her;
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly;
I don't know why she swallowed a fly – perhaps she'll die! ..."

 

The lady swallows increasingly bigger animals until at last... 

In There Was an Old Dragon Who Swallowed a Knight by Penny Parker Klostermann and Ben Mantle, the Old Lady is replaced by a Dragon who swallows a knight – how impolite!

There Was an Old Dragon Who Swallowed a Knight by Penny Parker Klostermann and Ben Mantle

Using the original structure to build the story, the author changes key elements to come up with a fun narrative that will engage knight-loving young readers, building up to a classic end-point for a picture book – bedtime.

The dragon swallows a steed, clippity-clippity, clippity-clop, then a squire to calm the steed, followed by a cook to cook for the squire, then a lady, and so on... and eventually the dragon eats a whole moat! Now, something must give! After an enormous BURP, everyone comes out safe and sound – except for the knight, who is now "just right. Good knight!" (You saw that pun coming!)

From There Was an Old Dragon Who Swallowed a Knight by Penny Parker Klostermann and Ben Mantle

From There Was an Old Dragon Who Swallowed a Knight by Penny Parker Klostermann and Ben Mantle

2. The House That Jack Built is a traditional English nursery rhyme, which first appeared in book form illustrated by Randolph Caldecott in 1887.

Caldecott's original book (published by Frederick Warne)

The House that Jack Built (published by Little Golden Book Classics)

"This is the house that Jack built.

This is the malt that lay in the house that Jack built.

This is the rat that ate the malt

That lay in the house that Jack built.

This is the cat

That killed the rat that ate the malt

That lay in the house that Jack built. ..."

'Ohana Means Family by Ilima Loomis and Kenard Pak uses the structure of The House That Jack Built to tell the story of how a Hawaiian family farm taro for poi to prepare for a traditional luau celebration. Using the pattern of language "This is the... that..." the author introduces all the elements of cultivating, harvesting and preparing the special food, building up to the moment where the family enjoy eating and sharing it together.

 Cover of 'Ohana Means Family by Ilima Loomis and Kenard Pak

From 'Ohana Means Family by Ilima Loomis and Kenard Pak

"This is the land that's never been sold, where work the hands, so wise and old,

 that reach through the water, clear and cold, 

into the mud to pick the taro to make the poi for our ohana's luau..."

 'Ohana Means Family by Ilima Loomis and Kenard Pak

3. The Gingerbread Boy is a cumulative fairy tale that was first published in 1875 in St. Nicholas: A Monthly Magazine for Boys and Girls.

From the original The Gingerbread Boy that appeared in
St. Nicholas: A Monthly Magazine for Boys and Girls.

The traditional contemporary tale has been often re-told as a classic known as The Gingerbread Man.

As soon as the Little Old Woman bakes the Gingerbread Man, he takes off, running. A chase ensues – the Little Old Woman is followed by her husband, the Little Old Man, who are followed by several animals, all eager for a bite of the biscuit, until at last... the fox gobbles him all up.

The Gingerbread Man (published by Ladybird First Favourite Tales)

"Run, run as fast as you can!

You can't catch me.

I'm the Gingerbread Man!"

 

The Gingerbread Bunny by Jonathan Allen

In The Gingerbread Bunny by Jonathan Allen, the Gingerbread Man is re-envisioned as a clever lift-the-flap adventure featuring a bunny with chocolate icing ears and paws and a white chocolate tail – totally delicious! And the twist? The fox, who claims to know nothing about a passing gingerbread bunny, says: "Everybody knows that foxes can't STAND gingerbread!... but they LOVE chocolate. Burp!"

From The Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales by Jon Scieszka and Lane Smith

In Jon Scieszka and Lane Smith's version, the Gingerbread Man becomes the Stinky Cheese Man with a piece of bacon for his mouth... he is SO smelly that no one wants to run, run, run after him and definitely not eat him!

The Gigantic Turnip by Aleksei Tolstoy and Niamh Sharkey is an example of a cumulative story where the characters all work together to achieve a goal.

The Gigantic Turnip by Aleksei Tolstoy and Niamh Sharkey

At first, the farmer and his wife pull, but they have no luck. Next, they enlist their big brown cow. And when that doesn't work, two pot-bellied pigs and, when that doesn't work, four speckled hens... and so on. They pull and pull and pull, and each time with no luck, so more animals must come to help. Not only is this story text cumulative in characters, but the animal numbers also add up. In the end, the addition of a tiny mouse makes all the difference – now, they can finally harvest the giant turnip and make soup for all to share!

From The Gigantic Turnip by Aleksei Tolstoy and Niamh Sharkey

In a similarly cumulative story structure, author Kes Gray builds up the tension in Eat Your Peas, masterfully illustrated by Nick Sharratt, as Mum promises Daisy more and more outlandish things in order to get her to eat her peas.

Eat Your Peas by Kes Gray and Nick Sharratt

From Eat Your Peas by Kes Gray and Nick Sharratt

No matter what Mum promises her, Daisy will not eat her peas, because, well, she simply does not like peas!

Then, in a fun twist at the end of the story, Daisy turns the tables on Mum: she would eat her peas, she bargains back, if Mum eats her Brussels sprouts. But Mum doesn't like Brussels sprouts... luckily, they both like ice-cream!

From Eat Your Peas by Kes Gray and Nick Sharratt

Oliver Jeffers' Stuck also includes a cumulative element that advances the narrative in a humorous way: a boy gets his kite stuck up a tree, so he throws first one shoe, then the next one to try to get it loose.

Stuck by Oliver Jeffers

When these also get stuck, he throws the cat into the tree to try to get the shoes and the kite unstuck... and so on, with more and more outlandish objects including an orangutan, the kitchen sink, the fire engine and the firemen.

From Stuck by Oliver Jeffers

But everything gets stuck!

From Stuck by Oliver Jeffers

In the twist, the boy gets a saw, but instead of sawing down the tree as readers might expect, he hurls it up into the tree to dislodge the kite. Sure enough, it works – the saw is stuck in the tree with everything else – but there isn't enough room for the kite so it finally falls down. Now, at last, the boy can fly it! 

Note how the text is not episodic even though it contains a cumulative "list" of objects that the boy throws up the tree to get his kite unstuck. Oliver Jeffers cleverly keeps the reader on their toes by upping the ante, adding bigger – and seemingly more unlikely – objects to the boy's quest to solve his problem. This adds humour also!

In writing a cumulative plot, it's key to keep escalating the plot in order to hook in readers so they will want to turn the pages to find out what will happen next.

The cumulative story structure can also be a useful tool in picture book nonfiction. For example, Melissa Stewart uses it in her book No Monkeys, No Chocolate, written with Allen Young and illustrated by Nicole Wong. 

 

No Monkeys, No Chocolate by Melissa Stewart and Allen Young, illustrated by Nicole Wong

Each section builds on the premise that you can't make X without Y and one idea leads to the next one:

"But you can't make chocolate without... cocoa beans" 

and... 

"Cocoa beans can't develop without cocoa pods"... and so on.

Using clever layered text, the authors take readers through the process of how cocoa grows, its interdependence on other creatures and its environment, leading up to the punchline: "Cocoa pods, flowers, leaves, stems, and roots can't grow without cocoa beans...

... and monkeys!"

From No Monkeys, No Chocolate by Melissa Stewart and Allen Young, illustrated by Nicole Wong

Keep cooking up your picture book: Why not try these cumulative story structures as a springboard on which to build you next picture book idea? Keep baking your picture book?

 

In part FOUR of this blog post series, we’ll explore more structures you can play with!

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Natascha Biebow is an experienced children's book editor, coach and mentor and founder of Blue Elephant Storyshaping. She loves to help authors and illustrators at all levels to shape their stories and fine-tune their work pre-submission. She is the author of the award-winning nonfiction picture book The Crayon Man: The True Story of the Invention of Crayola Crayons.

*Header illustration by Tita Berredo and Ell Rose